Song of Myself

Song of Myself

by Pinky Lui

 

There are always questions in my mind

of wondrous things and wandering thoughts

of passionate gazes and perpetual blindness

of all that bewilder me

I cannot figure out

Myself

 

Growing up and growing old

Missing home and missing goals

Forgetting self and forgetting hope

Remember loss

And there are so much to remember

 

The sun danced around the cold dead moon

for twenty winters

 

And I have lost so much

 

I am not Whitman, nor Whitman knew me

But we are the same

Poet of goodness and wickedness

Poets damned to be poets

He celebrated himself

I don’t celebrate

 

Let there be one day

When I can be away

Just jump out of my head

You know how you sound different

Outside of your head

There has to be more about me

I may like it

 

A song I must sing

But not under nosy scrutinizing stares

A song I must write

Midnight in Edinburgh’s green gone dark

 

And the curtain rises…

 

But a song is but a song

And the melody will stop

As the rhymes run out

And I will cease no more

 

I dream of a better place

for you and I both

with thousands of kittens meowing

and unicorns alive and running

Mermaids would lure men to their death

But women

we keep to ourselves

 

Daymares and nightwishes

You sleep when you walk

You wake up when you lie down

And all the day and hour and minute

crushing down

 

They pin your wrists like Jesus

and demand you to be a prophet

and they slash those brand-new leather whips down

you get no thorny crown

 

Whitman, you are selfish

You write yourself

What about me?

Don’t people look for guidance in words?

 

And you wrote so much

You’re my modern Gandalf

So lead me to slay dragons

 

I have to go back

 

No

 

But I have to go back

You heard the voices

 

 

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